Saturday Strolling.

What do you get when you mix horses, men in uniform, empty streets and a lot of important people? No, that's the not the blurb of 'Fifty Shades of Grey'.

Today I went to the Lord Mayor Procession and from a bird's eye, that's the image you'd be met with. The parade dates back to 1535 (pretty sure they still use all the exact same stuff, including the men) and is supposed to symbolize that the Lord Mayor was once one of the most prominent offices in England.

Today, it commemorates the role of horse shit cleaners.

It's such an important, historic procession to the people of England and it felt pretty cool being among it. We began at Holborn station and followed it all the way along the River Thames until it hit Fleet Street, where the men all stop and have a cup of tea and rest their weary bones. Ok, this isn't entirely true, nor at all, but the procession gets a bit wayward towards the end and I have a hunch that half the people have ditched and gone home for a cuppa or a pint at the local pub. There's a lot of music, waving and apparently the Parish of London have sponsoring rights as their signs seemed to pop up everywhere.

 After following it for awhile and feeling like we got the most out of it (including a photo with a very friendly costumed pensioner) we headed to Tesco's for a 3 pound meal deal lunch, choosing to eat it near the prestigious steps of King's College.

I got a little guided tour of the equally prestigious London School of Economics (or LSE to those in the know, or like me, those who know those who are in the know) and was intimidated tout de suite.

Something about people spending their Saturday's at the library, boys who are younger than me wearing suits and ties, and walking past a conversation involving "the dichotomy of England's politics and the critical role of Oliver Cromwell". Seriously.

I actually had to come home and watch 'Keeping up with the Kardashians' to get back to my IQ level.

Thinking of which, I kind of, like, might've, sorta, seen them today. I did. They were a block from where I live, chilling at the giant mall that is Westfield Shepherd's Bush. The crowds around them were huge and clearly Obama went without security for the day, because I could spot about 20 guards just from my viewpoint. I didn't get to meet them or have anything signed (cue violins) but I did get to stare, scream and cry. "Ohhh myyyy gaaawwwddd, it's actually the Kardashiaaannnsss", 13 year old girl swoons.

They didn't actually do much. Signed some stuff, shook some hands and did a brief Q and A where I could barely hear answers or anything over the "we love you"'s. I do have an added respect for their willingness to stay and greet everyone and sign whatever they had brought along. People say they're famous for nothing, which isn't true. They must have fantastic penmanship.

After a long day and a persistent, resilient sickness, I'm chilling it easy tonight. Me, Rowntree's Randoms, Company and a francais Video Ezy imitation piled high.